AfterWords | Being Formed

A short read
by Eric Seidel

Recently my eight-year-old son asked me, “Dad, why do we go to church?”

Seems like a simple enough question, but imagine the tone of resistance and mild gripe that accompanied it. You’d think that after all these years of bringing him to church, I would have thought this through and had a response figured out—packaged, rehearsed, and ready for when the question came. 

“Well, son, we go to church because… these are our people… this is what God wants for us… and this is what we do.”

Meh. Almost, but not quite. That impromptu answer, offered on the drive to church, was the best I could manage. I could hear my wife saying, “Needs work, Seidel.” My son might as well have said the same thing. There was no fooling him.

The good news is that I received very little resistance or questioning from my son this past Sunday. It was All Saints’ Day, and he knew exactly what that meant. No need to explain. All Saints’ Day at The Parish means only one thing to him: The Parish’s annual trunk-or-treat! With his Harry Potter costume, magical wand, and candy bag ready, he was all in.

There was a moment during the trunk-or-treat that stood out to me. My son is a classic introvert, like his father, but once he’s comfortable, he becomes the energy in the room—like his mother. He likes to observe, take it all in, and evaluate the situation. But once he realizes the people around him are his people, he loosens up. It’s a joy to watch.

This trunk-or-treat was a perfect example. He was so energized, I couldn’t keep up with him—running around, engaging with friends, going from trunk to trunk, making multiple rounds without asking permission. He was off and running.

This is why he goes to church. He was with his people. He knew his community. After all these years, he had been formed to embrace the love of the community he was a part of because he knew they loved him.

In Sunday’s sermon, Jordan shared the significance of our worship and how it shapes our spiritual formation. The Anglican church has a long history of emphasizing liturgy (liturgia, meaning “the work of the people”). The liturgy—the work we do in worship, the collective prayers we speak, the act of taking Communion—all contribute to our spiritual formation.

It’s not often emphasized in other church cultures, but as Anglicans we submit to the idea that how we worship affects our theology. How we pray as a community shapes how we pray when we’re alone. How we live in community influences how we commune with God and with family. The liturgy—the work of the people—forms us into being God’s people.

In 1 Corinthians 10:16, Paul says, “When we drink the cup of blessing, aren’t we taking into ourselves the blood, the very life, of Christ? And isn’t it the same with the loaf of bread we break and eat? Don’t we take into ourselves the body, the very life, of Christ?” (The Message). Through the act of taking the bread and wine, we take in the very life of Christ. The work we do forms us into the image God has for us.

Having been at the Parish for a while now, I’ve served in kids’ ministry since my son was in preschool. I’ve had the chance to see many of his classmates grow right alongside him. There’s one sweet girl, whom I’ll call Rebecca.

At the end of the service, when people are leaving, all the young kids get to run around. Rebecca and my son were playing tag as everyone exited. After the chase ended, they both ran toward me. Rebecca and my son have known each other since preschool. I’ve had the joy of worshiping, teaching, and serving with Rebecca right alongside my son.

After the chase was over, Rebecca came up to me:

Rebecca: “Mr. Eric, I love you!” she said, smiling broadly and stretching out her arms for a hug.
Me: “I love you too, sweet girl!” I replied, almost in tears, returning the hug with a huge smile.
Rebecca: “Mr. Eric, I love you!” she said again, stepping back and hugging me again.
Me: “I love you too! Thank you for saying that!

She told me two more times that she loved me, each time with another giant hug and smile. Then she and my son were off again.

I was struck. What a joy. What a gift. Rebecca has always been a little like my son—shy at first, but open and free once she knows her people. Perhaps she, too, has been formed. She knows she is loved by our community.

Rebecca and my son may not fully understand why we go to church, but they’re showing it.

Why do we go to church? To be formed into the love of Jesus through community.